Pessimism

If you didn't know,
I would hate to tell you so.

That the life we live
does not have much to give.

That the man of your dreams
is never what he seems.

That the love you feel
is not actually real.

That you and me
were never meant to be.

But regardless,
we'll find meaning in
almost anything.

Always creating something
out of absolutely nothing.

Opa

A thousand tiers
of a mystical mass,
Building, uniting, defying
as the storm does pass.

A thousand tears
for a noble man,
Building, uniting, defying
as a family can.

The skies clear
so that the eye can see
a beauty only known
by you and me.

The sun is setting.
The clouds reflecting,
great colors and depth.
My heart has strep.

Colliding within,
Nature begins
to take its toll,
and by doing so,

It shows us the balance
and guides the way
to understanding the challenge
of accepting today.

Beauty lines the path
and cushions the fall,
so when that fateful day comes,
I can still stand tall.

Melancholia

Only when you recognize the bad
do you see the good.

True bliss gleams
in the light of darkness.
And the most content feelings bloom
from the depths of sorrow.

Beauty unnoticed
comes out from hiding
and appreciation ignites.

Tears of sadness fill the ocean
so that joy can part the sea.

And we can finally see
And we can finally be
At peace.

Closer

I think I'm a lot closer to knowing myself more than ever before. I'm close enough at least. There will always be parts of me that wavers and that is lost, but as far as stability and comfort in who I am, I'm there. Now the discomfort comes more with how my life has and is playing out and how I am going to choose to play it out, but there is not necessarily uncertainty with myself. There’s a quote that I have always been quite fond of from Emerson’s Self-Reliance:

“There is a time in every man's education when he arrives at the conviction that envy is ignorance; that imitation is suicide; that he must take himself for better for worse as his portion; … [ ] … Trust thyself: every heart vibrates to that iron string.”

State of Mind

I am still a series of highs and lows,
but I think I have finally found a middle ground.
Accepting and expecting the least,
to help calm my nerves down.

I have found comfort in my own skin,
reaccepting what is within.
But future plans are still up in the air,
giving me no time to prepare,

For what is to come.

for west at west's

bird